If you're on a cruise, you're with newlyweds, over-feds and nearly deads!
How many men does it take to open a beer? None, it should be open when she brings it to you.
Patient: "Doc, you have to help me. Some days I think I'm Mickey Mouse, some days I think I'm Donald Duck" Doctor: "How long have you had these Disney spells?"
I'm a big sports fan. I keep the athletes cool while they're playing.
Did you hear about the two maggots making love in dead Earnest?
Are crop circles the work of a cereal killer?
Tony the Tiger was arrested for being a cereal killer.
Another way to say "water" is H2O. It sounds fancy, but it's just h, i, j, k, l, m, n and o.
If vampires have no reflection, how do they have such neat hair?
I have three beautiful children. I have four children, but only three are beautiful.
My friend is dieting. He says weight gain is due to water retention. My weight gain is due to ice cream retention.
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